An exploration into the depths of Psilocybin
|Route of Administration
|Oral, lemon tekked
I have been wanting to do mushrooms for my mental health for quite some time now, I felt very overdo to do the mushrooms and was excited to start. I was nervous but felt ready.
My friend, (who I will call X), planned to sit with me for the beginning and leave later on to let me solo trip.
Downing the shot of mushrooms was revolting, but better than chewing. Spilled some and had to clean it up and ingest what I could recover.
I started to feel a buzz and a glow, light visuals began to appear. This was odd as normally it takes me many hours for it to kick in and that is what I had been expecting. But alas, the trip was starting.
The shrooms kicked in fast and by the end of this timestamp I was peaked. My friend and I went out to the park, playing music, and just chatted about life.
The trip was interesting. As has previously happened in other trips, I had many suppressed memories and buried trauma that began to surface and as per usual I put it away. I listened to my friend X who kept chatting on and letting me just listen, I listened to the music as everything glowed and glimmered and shimmered around me. Everything was waving slightly and swirling with the most beautiful colors imaginable.
As I listened to my friend talk, we talked about varies issues I was struggling with while not going too deep. I had asked before hand to have a fun light trip and that it’s okay to keep moving on. We did this, and it felt in the background the mushrooms began solving my issues and telling me what I need to work on. I realized what I needed to do and what my current apparent issues are.
my friend grounding me massively impacted me and made it much easier not to stress and just enjoy the trip. I am very appreciative of them
I eventually finished with X and headed back home. Everything had a rainbow glow to it, the text on my phone shined as a prism, everything was light colored, almost pastel in a way. I journaled the different things that were brought into my mind during the trip. Unlike acid, shrooms did not bring me the usual light anxiety of different things I needed to solve right there. Usually during acid I can push the aside and have a fun time, but with these shrooms, I didn’t need to. The shrooms understood and let me enjoy and relax.
I was having difficulty sleeping and took multiple sleeping meds. I had decided that going to sleep was more important than being left in my own head and ruining any afterglow. I felt good, with a nice afterglow with pretty colors. I felt it was unfortunate that I didn’t feel a massive anti depressant effect that I normally feel from shrooms (and as of multiple days later this still is the case). But, it was still good for it to help me discover what I needed to deal with and as always, the shrooms were as loving as ever.
Conclusion / Aftermath
I’m glad I tripped and I feel it help me discover something inside myself that I haven’t accepted before. I have always felt some sort of queerness deep down, and the shrooms made me realize that it was just my trauma in the past that was blocking it. I have decided to push forward and continue to explore my sexuality thanks to this trip.